Finance, Forex and Investments

Why is my husband not talking with me?

We are married for more than 8 years. From the beginning , all our disagreements were based on what his parents tells us. They were so mean to me and teased me by all ways. Actually his mother is a control freak and she tried to stop our marriage, but in vain. Since then she along with her husband sweet talks my husband and ill-treats me privately. Now we are living in USA and his parents in India. Now also they insult me million times over phone. But my husband wants me to talk to them as if nothing has happened. Then I put the phone in speaker and he too knew what is happening, but still blindly commands me to behave nicely. I don't feel anything lovable in our relationship anymore. He NEVER supported me or never asked them to stop that non sense. When I cry heartbroken, he shouts at me to quit the drama. Last week i told him that I can't take it anymore and didn't talk with his parents. Then to my surprise he too stopped talking with me. He has never been so bad like this to me. But I am so much depressed on seeing him like this. When i asked him about his silence, he told he has nothing to talk to me. In India, most of the men marries a girl so that the bride takes care of the inlaws and brings home dowry, jewellery . we can't expect love from men. I thought I will be an exception, but my husband also behaved typically. other info: I have always been very supportive to my inlaws from the beginning. I have made my husband buy them all the basic needs like washing machine, fridge, etc etc. (I never counted what we presented them). Whenever they came to visit us, I have always been so obliging and tried to keep them happy. They usually say, they didn't like my dark brown skin and was expecting a fair skin girl and got disappointed by their son's choice. Also his mother couldn't accept his son falling in love with me, as they were aiming at an arranged marriage. Other than that, I have not done anything wrong. Please tell me, how to make my husband love me again. How can I make him talk with me again ? I want to make him understand my pain and I am also a human being like his parents. If we should go for a couple counseling in USA , where should we go? will he change and start caring for me as a real person? I am much worried of my future.

Public Comments

1. If it were me, I'd tell him, "OK, I will give you something to talk about." Then I would pick up the phone, call his parents, and cuss them up one side and down the other.
2. It's obvious your husband will always choose his family over you. Always. And you deserve more than that. His wife is supposed to come first at all times, not his family. Either leave him or get used to it - because you'll be dealing with this abuse for the rest of your life if you don't.
3. He has an obligation to protect you first. He wants to have a relationship with his parents, but his parents see him as weak and stupid. To my way of thinking, an attack on my significant other is an attack on me...and if he doesn't stand up for you and his family, he is weak. Tell him that a real man will stand up for you and your family and won't tolerate the kind of abuse they are leveling at them all. Remind him that his reaction makes him look weak and pathetic and that his parents don't respect him.
4. U said in india we dnt expect love from our husband is totaly wrong,do u have seen there in u.s.a.how people cheat to one another,y u blame all indian culture,also u said i have given some things fridge cooler etc.its due to ur culture and u looking cheap by this way u have got nri husband u dnt say,also ur husband loves u although u r dark skinned is plus point of him,although in u.s.a.where white gal he can find or in india,your husband told u u only talk to his mom is not wrong when he give u all,u r not serving ur mother and father in low as u r in u.s.a.then dnt blame that in india u should serve them. Stop ur mind game and thanks to ur husband and be nice and leave jealous so they all love you..